I wanted to find a space where I could share my personal journey, and connect with others on theirs. I’ve always felt compelled to share my latest epiphany and view of the world. There is no greater joy that I’ve experienced than to see someone benefit in their life from a new perspective or approach that I had the opportunity to introduce to them. If they could only see things as I did they would be better and happier.
For many years (almost all the ones I’ve had) I didn’t realize that I was the “know it all”. I had built an identity on a narrow definition of intelligence and effort. It’s foundation had been established in a fixed mindset built in my early years. I thought I was here to save them when I couldn’t take care of myself.
Building habits around a fixed mindset can immobilize. A good example is that I didn’t read a book from start to finish from the age of 12 to 42. Somehow I found a way to combine this fixed mindset with a purely materialistic view of success. This powerful duo helped me create a devastating cycle of applied effort, success, and lack of fulfillment. Not recognizing my fixed point-of-view on personal growth kept me locked in a cage of fear. I took few risks and grew very little.
These past few years have been transformational for me. It’s ok to be wrong, I don’t know that much, righteous indignation isn’t a strength, I am not my thoughts, etc etc. This list could probably go on for a while. Maybe I will make a complete list sometime, maybe I won’t. The one thing that hasn’t changed is that I want to help reduce the suffering in the world. I now realize I can only do that well by coming to terms with the suffering in myself.
Loving myself is a large part of this journey. Learning how to accept myself the way I am is both more difficult than I could imagine and the most empowering. This year I am giving myself the gift of time and space. While I don’t know what will come from this time away I am excited for the learning that will come from it.
6 months. The cycle continues. Despite what I will describe as my “best efforts” to make another level of meaningful changes in my life, I sit, overweight, and discouraged in my bed, quietly replaying the last six months.
What if the gravity of my habituation has become inescapable? Or, possibly, my prior attempts lacked the strategy, discipline, or necessity required to establish a new routine. Another question might be why haven’t I succumbed to the unconscious distractions of my past, at times feeling cursed by the need to do better, realize my potential, and discover the truth behind all the curtains we have put up to hide what truly matters.
I’ve been waking up for 45 years believing that I have something to say that matters and can make a positive difference for others. I don’t believe that is an individual phenomenon. My hope is that I will be able to share my journey and connect with, yours here. I know that the only way to fail is to stop, and the only way to succeed is to keep going. So, for today, this post is a step to keep moving forward.
I have been in search of a community of like minded people both to share ideas and experience for quite a while. I thought by creating social media accounts that shared my interests I would find connection, but found the type of communication I received out of alignment with this goal. My next thought was to get a coach, read more books and take on new experiences for myself. While this was more fulfilling than my first attempt, it still lacked the two way communication that I was ultimately searching for. I have found with the idea of growth club that there are many searching, not only for personal growth, but also wanting the connection and support that only a group can provide. This type of connection inspires me as a way to help individuals, and to make a larger impact on the community as a whole.
With that thought in mind I am going to give this website thing a try. My goal is to combine the sharing of personal stories, best practices, experiences, books, advice and communication in the form of blogs, videos, podcasts, book reviews, document sharing, etc. My intention is not to create a site from a singular point of view, meaning, I am not creating Christian’s blog. I am hoping to having many participants and contributors that will shape the direction and message.
I am constantly inspired by the three of you and at our core I believe we are aligned on the larger questions about people and life. I would be honored if you would be interested in taking this path as part of your journey.